Who's Stanley Yelnats?
Stop. Just... stop.
Stanley Yelnats had the unfortunate circumstance of being found guilty of stealing. He was sent to Camp Green Lake, rather than being incarcerated. He makes some friends, gets a cool nickname, and learns all about the legend that is Kissin' Kate Barlow. In a nutshell, Stanley's purpose: teaching youth everywhere that when life hands you free sneakers, you'll end up digging holes until you find a trunk with your name on it and end up a multi-millionaire at the age of fifteen.
You know... the stuff kids dream about.
Well, there is a delightful character in the novel. Sam the Onion Man. Oh, Sam. He was perfect.
I can remember the day I went and saw "Holes" in the theater. It was a little movie theater in North Carolina. The kind of movie theater that only played one movie at a time because it was that little. It was cool, because we pretty much had the theater all to ourselves. (Plus, you could hear the movie in the bathroom. I have no clue why that was such a big deal for me.) Sam the Onion Man was played by the beautiful Dule Hill. The same smooth talking sidekick from Psych? ("You heard about Pluto? That's messed up, right?" Nice pick-up line, Gus.) Yes, Dule Hill. I can still hear my mother saying, "He's a very good-looking [man]."
Can I get an "Aaawwwww yeeeaaaahhhhh"?
ANYWAY...
Sam has this little phrase he uses repeatedly throughout the movie. Whether it was a leaky roof, a window that was stuck, or a broken heart, Sam could fix it. The way he said it could make anyone swoon. (Dule even did it on Psych.)
That phrase has been used in my family for ten years. And when it's said, whether it's a serious situation or not, we say it like Sam the Onion Man. Well, that one and "Well, excuuuse me" said like Sigourney Weaver. (Not that it matters, but when I refer to myself as Catharine, I say it like the girl who marries Trout - Miss Kath-a-rine.) Most people don't get the reference or why we might smirk when we say it.
You know, it's quite shocking actually, how many people have never read "Holes" or even seen the movie. It's not only shocking, but beyond disheartening. There is something about this book that is timeless. It applies to all ages. It's a classic book (can I say that of a book of fifteen years?) that people can relate to at all ages. It deals with complexities and social issues that prove to still be prominent in society today. And it's done with lovable characters and a sense of humor.
So, here's to that time of year - where it's crazy hot outside and I read that book for the nine hundredth time.
I leave you with this... my heart is breaking...
